Monday, September 14, 2009

Kanye West , please sit down

DoucheBag: (n.) - an individual who has an overinflated sense of self worth,
compounded by a low level of intelligence, behaving ridiculously
in front of colleagues with no sense of how moronic he appears.

I know that this anti-Kanye West sentiment has probably already been beaten to death in the 15 hours since his stunt on the MTV Video Music Awards last night, but I feel the need to comment and I need something more substantial than my Facebook status.

Kanye's 1st album was good. I bought it. I even used Through the Wire in a civil rights lesson plan. Then I bought his second album and liked that too. Gold Digger and The Kanye West Workout Plan made my running mixes.

Somewhere along here, he lost his goddamn mind and started equating himself to Jesus. Arrogance and ego aren't the most endearing traits...but posing on the cover of Rolling Stone wearing a crown of thorns? Seriously dude - even those of us who don't believe in Jesus are having a hard time making that stretch. He accused George Bush of hating all black people, which while entertaining, isn’t true. George Bush rejects all that is unfamiliar, this includes gays, liberals, Arabs and women, not just black people. After being labeled as a non-gangster rapper he publically talked smack about 50 Cent when their albums were released the same week. Dude, 50 Cent has bodyguards and wears a bulletproof vest – perhaps not the guy to get snotty with! He’s even managed to attract the ire Evel Knieval and when Knieval fights you, literally to his death you know you’re a complete turd muffin. He even usurped the title of King of Pop following Michael Jacksons death…now whether you are the messiah or not is between you and your God, but this I know for sure: the King of Pop you ain’t.

It seems that last night West recognized that challenging people with numerous bullet wounds wasn’t exactly intelligent, and went after fluffy, baby animal like teen pop star Taylor Swift instead. When he stormed the stage at the VMA’s I couldn’t help but think, “this seems eerily familiar.” It seemed familiar because it was familiar. Our dear friend Kanye threw a very similar tantrum at the 2006 MTV Europe Video Awards when he did not win Best Video, crashing the stage to argue why he should have won during the winner’s acceptance speech. Far less hyped then (it was just Europe after all) he still issued an apology then too. I haven’t heard it but I imagine it sounds as disingenuous and insincere as the one he issued via his blog last night. Maybe he thought that it would be okay this time since he was disrespecting a colleague (ahem…please see above definition of douche bag) in the un-solicited defense of another colleague rather than padding his own ego. He was wrong. It was equally as douche-arific, if not more so. At Katy Perry oh so aptly Tweeted, “it’s like you stepped on a kitten.”

Now Taylor Swift may be a little squeaky, she’s a bit wispy and plays up the innocent little girl card more than is my taste, and yeah, Beyonce’s video was better (and for it she won Best Music Video) but COME ON! She’s 17 – we’re all allowed to be slightly less than a force to be reckoned with then abruptly attacked on national TV when we are teenagers. So, bravo for Taylor for being a scared deer in headlights – your timidity came across and will go down as class. Bravo to Beyonce, for classing up the trashiest of trashy moments ever to be associated with you. Kanye, sit down and shut up.

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