Attack of the Irrational Fatsies

USUALLY a good work out is good for at least 5 hours of that je nes sais quoi that I like to call "psychologically skinny."  No matter how great the work out, you didn't actually loose 5 pounds, the endorphins just make you feel like you did. 

Could someone please e'splain to me why, not even 2 hours post-work out I looked in the mirror and I swear I am larger when when I started. 

Grawr.

Welcome Back Timmy T

Timmy Tebow has never been my fave Gator (I know, I know) but this...

Hellooooo there ;)

Colorado is agreeing with you.

Wondering...

Why do people insist on using the terms 'virtue' and 'virginity' interchangeably. 

Just in case you were wondering:

Virgin (n.) - a person who has never had sex
Virtue (n.) - the quality of doing what is right and avoiding what is wrong

I am not okay with people trying to legislate and legalize morals but I am really not okay with people inflicting their morals on the English language. 

They are NOT synonyms!!

Thinking...

There's nothing like writing something snotty to find out exactly how many people read your blog.

The best thing ever

There are numerous things that I have termed to be "the best thing ever."  Firth thing ooff the top of my head would have to be Erica's 30th Birthday cake.  Even now, a week after the fact, I wanted to move into that cake and spend my life eating my way out.  Then there's Zumba w/ Susan.  Zumba on it's own isn't the best thing ever, but Zumba with Susan...well now that's something to write home about.  And then there are scrubs, scrubs not only save me from my closet at least three times a week but they're pajamas that count as work attire!

Tonight though I think I may have found truly THE BEST THING EVER.  Watching "Kourtney and Khloe Take Miami" with Wes. 

It's trash and I know it's trash but it's trash that I just can't look away from. With the assistance of a beer or two I can sometimes convince Wes not to abandon the couch at the first note of the LMFAO theme song.  It seems a silly thing to plot for and all is calm for the first few minutes, then....THEN....Scott Disick shows up:

"Oh God."

"Oh no.  No, no, no, no, no."

"MY EYES!!!  NO!!  I can't watch this!!"

"I mean...he's wearing a blue sweater around his neck with a lime green shirt.  COME ON."

....

"Oh...that poor bastard...he just brought all of this down on himself and now he doesn't know what to do."

.....

"oh oh oh....look at her faaaaaaaaace!"

I'm trying SO DAMN HARD to describe the attitude that's being thrown at me from the other side of the couch right now and I just seriously don't have the words.  It's this perfect blend between disdain, annoyance, intrigue and disbelief.

This might be THE BEST THING EVER.

Whargarble

Today is a day of whargarble.

My alarm didn't go off.  Thankfully I seem to have developed an internal alarm and only woke up about 15 minutes late.  Nevertheless, waking up to realize that you didn't wake up on time...well it's just kerflumoxing is all.  It (admittedly unnecessarily since being 15 minutes late to work is NOT the end of the world) throws me off what little game I have.

There was a coffee explosion in my car.  The magnitude of said explosion was great enough that it necessitated a Ubert and a costume change thus delaying my arrival to work juuuuuuust a bit more.

I forgot my phone at home.  Not earth shattering but inconveniencing to say the least.

My lady died.  Okay, so she was technically Leslie's lady but she was wonderful and so I claim her as at least 1/2 mine.  I would like to say that she was dealt a crappy hand but she would probably disagree and remind me that this hand was simply one of many she'd gotten in her life.  She carried herself with grace, dignity and kindness.  She was loved.  She will be very much missed.

I am frustrated today.  I feel bound and restricted.  I am sad that I can write about my sorrow in losing a patient, yet I still cannot write about my Grandma.  I just don't yet have the words yet.  

I am in need of Taco Tuesday.

when will I learn?

When will I learn that THIS:

ACTUALLY IS THE DEVIL!!

And this is why I didn't miss cable

Watching TV in bed is supposedly one of THE WORST things that you can do. (After drinking Diet Coke in all of its chemically goodness of course.)  It stimulates the brain and makes it difficult for good sleepers to fall asleep and next to impossible for insomniacs to turn themselves to the off position.  I always figured that my brain was more engaged when reading then when watching TV but apparently engaged and stimulated are two different demons.   Nevertheless, I've been watching TV in bed, right before falling asleep.  The call of The West Wing Season 1 is just to great.

It's because I have cable.

I haven't written a blog of worth in weeks.  Now that I've written that sentence, I'm now questioning the "worthiness" of any blog I've ever written. (Question though: if the entirety of this page is considered my blog, then what would we call each individual entry?  Are they also blogs? or perhaps blogettes? blobcicles?  Blobcicles it is!) I'm going to assert that based on mental health benefits provided to me by maintaining this blog that the blog itself is worthy, each blobcicle though...questionable.  Of late they've been infrequent and less original that I usually like to lay claim to.  It's not that interesting things haven't happened either.  I went to My Big Fat Polish Funeral a few weeks back, even if nothing else had happened I'd have blog fodder for WEEKS based on this!

It's the cable.

My books-I-want-to-read list is ridiculous!  It hasn't been this long since graduate school when fun books weren't allowed within my reach for fear of neglecting the piles of necessary academic reading.  While my list hasn't quite reached the epic proportions that it saw in the Summer of 2007, I also don't have quite the time crunch I did then.

It's the damn cable box and it's snazzy record-ability.

Why would I read, write or research when there's endless syndication of The West Wing, Gilmore Girls and Grey's Anatomy?  ENDLESS ENTERTAINMENT FOR ALL SIDES OF MY BRAIN!!

Seriously.  It's bad.  The gym is pretty much the only thing that hasn't fallen to the lure of the DVR.

Birthday Month Cometh

Birthday month is imminent, especially if by imminent we mean next month.

It's Friday

I know that it's Friday because my desk is overcrowded with a giant almost empty Starbucks coffee cup, two half-drunken bottles of water, a Diet Coke and a bottle of chewy vitamins.

You mean we're supposed to WORK on Fridays?

Grandma