Oh no they didn't

Sometimes, I like bad TV.  Yes, yes, I said it.  I like bad TV, the crap kind that rots my brain, whittles away at my self respect and encourages a life of depravity and sin. There's several levels of crappiness and for those days when Jersey Shore is a little too much, but Gilmore Girls isn't?  I turn to Say Yes to the Dress.  Just in case you have been living under a rock, Say Yes to the Dress capitalizes on the wedding mania that has seemingly gripped the under-40, female portion of the nation.  A 'reality' show based in Kleinfelds in NYC, each episode follows several brides while they try to find the wedding dress of their dreams.  If there is any show that elevates the Wedding over the Marriage, it is this one. 
The triumph of The Wedding over Marriage is nothing new but the glorification of it seems to be reaching a fever pitch.   There is a rhetoric that seems to surround weddings lately ( i.e. "MY special day" or the day that "I am a princess") that is lacking in the concept of 'we' that I thought was inherent in matrimony.  Please don't get me wrong - I've been to many heartfelt, sincere and beautiful weddings the past few years and I know that the concept of marriage is alive and well.  It's just this idea perpetuated by shows such as Say Yes to the Dress in which women, who identify having a more than ample budget of 3 thousand dollars with which to purchase a dress, throw all caution to the wind and spend the equivalent of the down payment for a house instead.  All because it is what they want.

My disdain for the ideals being portrayed in this show is hypocritical because it in no way, shape or form dissuades me from watching it.  The dresses are beautiful, there's just no way around that.  The people range from from blase to dramatic, completely normal to flaming insane.  They yell, they cry and then they just start making shit up.  It's always a good time, mostly because I can almost always find the entertainment value in the unwarranted tears of the self-absorbed and insane. 


While watching Say Yes today I saw an add for a special episode called "Say Yes to the Dress: Big Bliss."  A special show that showcases plus sized brides searching for their dream wedding dresses.

Excuse me?

I have to admit, my first reaction was positive.  The average size of a bride-to-be on this show is a size 4, four full sizes below the national average.  A more realistic pool of women searching for dresses would be welcome indeed, thank God for it!   Then it hit me.  Our own show?  Really?  My ass actually needs to be separated from smaller asses in IT'S OWN SHOW?

Oh. No. They. Didn't.

This attempt to be culturally relevant, to not perpetuate the image of starving, bony women as the ideal of beauty does the exact opposite.  It says that maybe it's okay to be larger than a size four, but while you are not exactly inferior, you are most certainly not equal.  In fact, you need your own show, because if we put you in the regular show then people wouldn't watch.  Yes, obesity is an issue in this country and yes it should be addressed, but it should not be divisive.  Fat is not a whole different demographic. If you want to support women of all different sizes then do it, but don't separate them into categories. 

 There has been a lot of press lately regarding a comment made by an actress from the HBO series, True Blood.  When asked about her diet and exercises regimen, Kristin Bauer admitted that she is, and for as long as she continues to be in show business will continue to be, hungry.  This is the price she willingly pays for being an actress.

I am glad that Kristin Bauer was honest.  I am glad that she did not toe the line of every size two actress out there who insists they eat cake and carbs and everything delicious, just "in moderation." I am glad in the way I was when Gwen Stephani told reporters that her body was not accidental, rather it was the result of hard work and never taking a day off from her diet.  Women are telling the truth about what they pay and sacrifice to be "beautiful" even when its insane, yet they continue to do it.  Somewhere along the way we decided that not eating was an okay sacrifice, that thin tastes better than cheesecake.

There is something that tastes better than being thin.  It's called self-respect.